A Reason for Apology
by brookemopolitan
Summary: Set after Caspian's temptation.Susan opens his eyes to the evil of the White Witch


Right, so this is my very first Narnia fic, so bear with me here. After seeing _Prince Caspian_ for the fourth time, this little bunny got stuck in my head and it won't leave! I've taken a few liberties with the timeframe, but I still think it flows rather well. Reviews make me smile

Disclaimer: I do not own the Chronicles of Narnia. If I did, Susan would not have such a bogus backward character development. You may notice some lines stolen from the movie Prince Caspian, and some paraphrasing from the book. Don't sue if you please!

* * *

Susan wriggled slightly against the rigid cold of the Stone Table, shifting Lucy in her arms and willing sleep to come. In a few short hours the Pevensie sisters would be riding into the Shuddering Woods to seek out Aslan, whilst her brothers and Prince Caspian would lead the Narnian forces in the greatest uprising since the White Witch was defeated.

A shudder ran down Susan's spine. The White Witch. They had gone through hell, literally defeating death to destroy her, and they had been one drop of blood away from bringing her back. Susan froze as she heard a rock shift; and her hand fell, by pure instinct, to the smooth birch of her bow.

"I apologise, your Majesty. I did not mean to wake you. I merely wished to seek an audience if you were available." A Telmarine accented voice echoed about the How. She knew that voice. Prince Caspian the Tenth, the first leader of the Narnian Rebellion, the young prince with the nobility reminiscent of the Golden Years, the same man who had returned the Kings and Queens of Old to Narnia, and had also taken them to within an inch of their oldest foe. She felt her cheeks colour slightly at the sound of his voice, but willed herself to remain rational. She turned her head to face him, standing awkwardly in the doorway of the most sacred room in all of Aslan's How. She motioned for him to remain silent, before gently sliding Lucy out of her arms, placing a sisterly kiss on her forehead and strode towards the forest into the moonlight, bow and arrow seeming an extension of her limbs.

"You wished an audience with me, Prince Caspian, now an audience you have. Come; say what you must" Susan muttered bluntly, rising from a polite curtsey, as the mantle of the Queen of Old slipped over her like a protective cloak, all the while her eyes were taking in the lack of people on the edge of the wood. Caspian inclined his head politely.

"I wished to apologise for my actions earlier. I lost sight of hope and desired a quick fix to our troubles." He whispered; shame evident in his tone. Susan sucked in a breath.

"Tell me, Prince Caspian the Tenth, do you truly know why you are apologising?" The Queen of Old questioned. Caspian's eyes snapped up, and looked at her questioningly. Susan continued.

"I believe that you apologise to me merely from good courtly manners, but you have no true inclination of what your actions this evening meant." The icy words spilling forth from Susan's lips hit their target as well as her arrows did, and Caspian's shoulders slumped more with each word.

"As I understand, My Queen, your brother, King Edmund the Just was taken by the White Witch's lies, and nearly betrayed you all. At least, that is what the legends say." Caspian replied quietly. A mirthless laugh escaped Susan's lips, and at that moment she shrugged off any illusion of royalty. She dropped to the ground and began to pick at the grass.

"Ah yes, the old stories are true. Edmund was taken in by the lies of Jadis, certainly. But how much do the old tales tell you of the sacrifices made to spare his life after his betrayal?" Caspian took a seat beside her, recalling all the stories the Professor told him as they gazed at the stars in secret.

"Aslan took the place of Edmund, giving himself to the White Witch in King Edmund's place." Caspian slowly pieced together.

"Ah, the good Prince was a diligent student. Tell me, My Liege, do the old fables recount anything of the evening of Aslan's death?" Susan questioned, voice tightened by the knot woven in her throat. Caspian opened his mouth as if to speak, but then closed it and almost whispered

"Nay, My Queen, they do not". Susan sucked in the largest breath she was able.

"I was there my good Prince. Lucy and I followed Aslan on the night he sacrificed himself for Edmund. We were the last to see him. We had no idea what we were to fear as we wove our fingers in his mane and pressed kisses to his great sad face before he bade us to hide. I was there for his torture, his humiliation…" A sob rang out from her throat. Susan closed her eyes and pushed her feelings to the pit of her stomach. Caspian grasped her hand, eyes never leaving her face. Susan swallowed and continued.

"I watched her plunge the stone knife into his flesh. I watched them leave his body to rot. Lucy and I took up a vigil over his cold body, crying until there were no more tears left to give. We alone bore the terror that was that evening." Susan took a breath, and through tear filled eyes saw the guilt wrack over Caspian, his head bowed. With her free hand, she moved her hand to his chin and lifted his face to meet hers.

"I do not tell you this, my dear Caspian, to fill you with guilt or grief. That grief is for Lucy and me alone to bear. As reward for that living nightmare, we were the first to see the risen Aslan. We got to laugh with him and play with him as if he were a large kitten, and to ride on his back as if he were our pony. I tell you this story only to make you understand what you apologise for."

Susan went to stand, but Caspian's grip on her hand was sure.

"My Queen," came his heavily accented whisper. She locked eyes with him, as she saw that sun was slowly beginning to rise.

"My Queen, surely now, you can accept my most heartfelt apologies. I did not wish to bring any suffering to your heart. I only wished for a way of satisfying my desires for retribution by the most convenient means, but you more than anyone else has shown me the error of my ways. I can only hope that you will grant me forgiveness, though I am not worthy of it."

Susan allowed a true smile for the first time in days grace her lips. She brushed a lock of hair out of Caspian's eyes as the morning light gave birth to brilliant oranges and pinks.

"All is forgiven, my dear Prince. Please, do not allow yourself to be wounded by grief that is centuries old. Get some rest; Narnia is sure to need their hero today." Caspian stood, and offered Susan his hand. She accepted it and he began to escort her towards the How. They reached the entrance to the innermost room of the How, and Caspian stopped abruptly.

"I hope, my Queen, that you do not despise me too much." He said cautiously, not meeting her eyes.

"I have never told anybody that story Caspian, so I suppose that shows you one thing. I certainly do not despise you, I trust you." Susan smiled. Caspian brought Susan's right hand to his lips and placed a lingering kiss upon it.

"That trust, my Queen, is more precious than jewels." He murmured, before striding away. Susan shook her head, willing rationality to overtake the fluttering of emotion, before curling against Lucy, sleep finding her much more willingly.

* * *

Hours later, Susan found herself atop the Prince's horse, her mouth dry as she gripped the reigns of the nervous horse tightly and swallowed. There was a reason she was known as Queen Susan the Gentle! Caspian's voice drew her from her reverie. He stood next to her, her horn held out to her.

"I think it is time you had this back" He said humbly, still refusing to meet her eyes. Susan smiled, and attempted to lighten the mood.

"Keep it. You might need to call me again." With that, she urged the horse to move, ignoring Lucy's jibes and chuckling over the bemused expression on the poor prince's face.

* * *

Caspian's smile flashed at Susan.

"Are you sure you don't need that horn?" He mocked her lightly. Susan took the Prince's arm and swung herself behind him on the saddle. She leaned close to his ear as he galloped away and whispered;

"I knew I was right to trust in you Caspian. Thank you for restoring my faith." Caspian smiled, her warm breath sending shivers down his spine.

"I am glad I could be of service my Lady." He replied, bringing the horse to a stop as King Miraz and Peter duelled.

* * *

Well, that certainly went to a different place than I expected! I hope you guys find this to be realistic, I always thought that Susan would be just a bit pissed at Caspian for what he did, especially after the filthy look she gives him. Please review guys, it'll make my day! Pax!


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